:) (> Mike's Struggle <) (:

The Story of Mike, My Fight For Lilly & My Defective Mind. Home Of: MichaleJGranata.com & LillyMakar.com

Pain / 9.30.2012

I hurt and feel sad i have this emptiness i cant feel but try with food. I eat and eat till i am fat.  Then the feelings of failure and me being pathetic set in. I hate myself even more after i eat the emptiness away even thou it does not really feel the void. Nothing can feel the void nothing can fix the pain. I am lost just hoping the end comes soon.

I think i am going to go back to cutting or getting high because its better then being fat and also numbs the pain better then food.  But with this down i have been feeling lately i just dont feel like doing anything really but eat sweet things.

The night is the bad time i do fine at the day hours. Something about the dark that makes the pain worse.

I know if i could only deal with what cause the empty then i might be fixed but then again i might not be strong enough to deal with what which makes me so broken.  It takes all i have just to ho from day to day living in this prison i built for myself.

Hurt pain empty lone sad cold screw up worthless fat


Tell me what you think

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on September 30, 2012 by in Journal and tagged .
%d bloggers like this: