The Story of Mike, My Fight For Lilly & My Defective Mind. Home Of: MichaleJGranata.com & LillyMakar.com
****Posted from another journal I wrote****
Well people don’t like it when i say i am broken, but thats the way i feel. I feel like a big broken freak, like everyone ca see my problems as if they where written on my shirt. I am all wise trying to act normal but the only time I feel normal is when I am drunk. Maybe it not really feeling normal but that i can’t hear or see my problems. I am not stupid i know they don’t go away cause I am drunk so please don’t message me with that stuff. But it is nice to one night total of maybe 12 hrs to not have to live with in my problems. To be free, to be normal. How broken am I when I like feeling normal. Most people try to be different, I try to fit in.
I guess some of this is my paranoid, I know that people can’t read my mind or see the problems that I don’t let show. But every time I see someone looking at me or giving me that glance, and that weird silence when your talking to someone. My mind just goes wild with thought going at the speed of light. And I start to feel trapped. Trapped like a rat in a maze, a broken rat.